Category Archives: America

Culinary arts, broken toes and peaches

Hi readers.  Thanks for coming by for a read.

Because of the differences in our dietary idiosyncracies Jeanne and I don’t cook much for one another, almost never anything shared.  I usually cook breakfast for her, but only as a separate deed.

So yesterday when she pronounced she was going to make two [2] peach pies, one for me without salt, one for herself, I was only surprised she was doing one for me.  She carefully cut up the peaches, got everything ready but the crusts, then refrigerated it all.

I thought she’d already found the crust recipe she’d been searching for.  But there she was barefoot by the bookcase, holding the 10 pound, The Victory Cook Book, Binding of the American Woman’s Victory Edition published in 1943.  Edited by Ruth Berolzheimer, director of the Culinary Arts Institute.

Great book.  Dedicated to General Douglas MacArthur.

“His heroic leadership and gallant fight against overwhelming odds should inspire every American woman to make the most of daily opportunities to support the war effort in her home and in every sphere of worthwhile activity.”

Nice full page pic of Dugout Dug inside opposite the dedication, him having recovered from his nighttime scurry out of Manila leaving his command to surrender to the Japanese, Death March across Bataan, that sort of thing.
But I digress.

Jeanne tried to lift that book and SPANG, it slipped out of her hand!  She doesn’t have much strength in it because it was broken a while back, and it’s not easy for her to remember. CRUMP went Douglas MacArthur and all the cuisine prepared by the women of America supporting WWII.

Jeanne doubled over in pain and I hopped up figuring I’d try to help.  But Jeanne just lost WWII and the War in the Pacific, broke at least one toe, possibly two.

By the end of the evening the one toe was swelling and turning purple.  We were alternating artificial ice in and out of the freezer, and she was in a lot of pain.  The toe is purple enough for most usual purposes today and swollen, but she’s able to get around.

All the peaches are there in the fridge, but I’m thinking I might just figure on eating them without pie crust.  She’s going out with friends tonight and planning to be busy today, so I don’t think cooking pie is in the cards.

I suggested she tell her friends when they ask why she’s limping, tell them I pissed her off and she sidekicked me in the head.  If she doesn’t take me up on it she’s missing one hell of a good story.

Old Jules

Veterans Today: Chumps R Us Club: Part II

Chumps R Us Club: Part II

http://www.veteranstoday.com/2014/08/17/chumps-r-us-club-part-ii/

Horrified Subway Execs Assumed People Were Buying Footlongs To Share With A Friend

The Onion

http://www.theonion.com/video/horrified-subway-execs-assumed-people-were-buying,36800/?utm_source=The+Onion&utm_campaign=15d188fe67-

The_Onion_Newsletter_Daily_Template&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_6a8b5ad20e-15d188fe67-16729065

The sandwich chain says it is ‘deeply sorry’ if customers mistakenly believed that eating an entire foot of food could somehow be considered healthy.

The Who-Ya-Gonna-Kill-Next Lottery tickets on sale at your Army Recruiter

Hi readers.  Back in the summer of 1961 the Rooskies were building the Berlin Wall and naturally we were all scared shitless they’d be wanting France or Britain next.  Because we were all dumber than cluckshit and we believed what the US government told us.

Anyway, July 1961, I was feeling patriotic as hell, wanted to kill me some young Russian guys.  Maybe shoot them, blow their damned brains from hell to breakfast.  Or maybe stab them with a bayonet close up, personal and bloody.  So I joined the US Army figuring they were the only branch of the service that actually rubbed up against Rooskies.

Damned Navy guys just floated around safely out in the ocean in ships loaded up with guns and munitions, never get a shot at a single Rooskie, most likely.  And the Air Force guys trained with .22 caliber rifles.  Jeeze.  Whoooo wants to shoot a damned Russian kid with a .22?  Stupid damned Air Force guys didn’t even march around carrying full field packs.

And the US Marines sounded okay, but how the hell would a Marine get all the way over to where there were Rooskies to be killed?  Ivan was going to be trying to hide behind that Berlin Wall.  Getting at him would be a job for good old American dogfaces, climbing over that wall and charging into machine guns aimed by Rooskie kids.  The best a Marine could hope for was maybe getting a chance to kill a Chinaman.

Whell hayuls bayuls!  I spent three years, went through the Cuban Missile Crisis, sea cruised to Japan and Korea and back, and never got to kill nobody, and especially not some Rooskie teenager with a bayonet nor hand grenade.

So I came home and the Vietnam War geared up, and I got out.  The guys who went in just after I did ended up killing all manner of brown people who didn’t need killing, but no damned Rooskies.  Nor Chinamen, either.

Later on guys volunteered to go kill brown people in wossname, Kuwait, Iraq, and that other place over there, Africanistan?  Something along those lines, anyway.  But the Rooskies had donealready pulled all their teenagers back inside their boundaries and good American boys couldn’t get at them.

But there’s still hope.  Some damned warlord over there is making a nuisance of himself and threatening to send some teenagers off to get their asses blown away, and the guy, wossname, in the White House is making noises suggesting he might lie claiming those Rooskie kids need killing.

He ought to have a belly full of killing brown people by now.  Rooskie white kids would be a refreshing change.  And meanwhile there’s that hodgepodge thing going on over in Western Iraq and Syria where the sky’s the limit.  Hells bells, just kill anythng that moves and you’ll hit someone who hates our guts.  Because we’ve probably blown the legs off their relatives one-time-or-another.

As a backup plan, if our boys run out of people to drop explosives on, there’s always white people living in Israel, but they’re harder targets, hiding in colonies over in Palestine.
Old Jules

 

 

 

Elderly Lobbyist Always Droning On About How Little Legislation Cost In His Day

 The Onion – NewsPoliticspoliticiansISSUE 50•34Aug 27, 2014

Foraker once again tells colleagues the same story about how he only needed $5,000 and some moxie to manipulate a Senate vote on automobile fuel economy standards back in 1979.

WASHINGTON—Citing his habit of haranguing younger colleagues about the way things used to be, sources confirmed Wednesday that 74-year-old veteran ExxonMobil lobbyist Hank Foraker is constantly droning on about how much cheaper legislation was back in his day.

The longtime Washington power broker is said to rarely miss an opportunity to hold forth on “the good old days” of the 1970s and ’80s, often repeating the same long, rambling stories about a time when lobbyists and their clients reportedly received a lot more political influence for their dollar than they do today.

“Let me tell you, back when I was a young man, you could get a half dozen bills pushed straight through both houses for what a single congressman’s vote will run you nowadays,” said Foraker, who remarked that 30 years ago, acquiring an exemption from the Clean Water Act cost a tiny fraction of what it does today. “And you’d still have plenty left over to purchase the loyalty of a Cabinet member or a handful of senior White House advisers, too. You don’t even want to know how little it took to buy off a governor back then. You probably wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

“It was just a simpler time,” Foraker added. “A quick phone call, a small payoff, and in no time at all, your client could be extracting oil from a federal wildlife preserve. Those were the days.”

According to sources, Foraker often grows wistful for a past in which an eager young lobbyist on a shoestring budget could secure basic legislative carve-outs and tax loopholes for the industry he represented. He noted that a person equipped with the same resources today “wouldn’t even be able to get a simple poison-pill amendment passed.”

Several coworkers stated that on multiple occasions, Foraker has lectured them at length on how there was once a time when it was unheard of for Big Oil interests to pay $500,000 for a House Energy Committee chairman’s cooperation over a two-year term. Additionally, they said he often grows irritated when lobbyists in their 20s and 30s complain about campaign finance restrictions, insisting that at their age, he’d had to surreptitiously pay lawmakers in person to ensure passage of the Trans-Alaska Pipeline Authorization Act of 1973.

“These guys have it so much easier today,” said Foraker, explaining how modern oil industry lobbyists can, with the click of a button, electronically funnel millions of dollars to a super PAC running television ads in support of the Keystone Pipeline. “In the ’80s, you’d take a lawmaker out to a nice steakhouse, look him in the eye, hand over a briefcase with $10,000 in cash toward a reelection campaign, and promise him a highly paid position on your company’s board of directors if he worked to repeal the crude oil windfall profit tax. And in those days, a handshake and your word actually meant something.”

“Now, you’re lucky if organizing a $5,000-a-plate campaign fundraiser gets you 20 minutes alone with a ranking senator on an energy subcommittee to discuss ways to weaken nationwide renewable fuel standards,” Foraker added. “It’s just not as personal as it used to be.”

Many fellow lobbyists conceded to reporters that while Foraker’s tendency to nostalgically reminisce can be endearing at first, it quickly becomes tiresome listening to him talk endlessly about how expensive it has become to hire former high-level officials from the Department of Energy and use their bureaucratic connections to obstruct new offshore oil rig safety regulations.

“Hank’s a nice guy, but I don’t really need to hear about how the amount we recently paid to get the ban lifted on deepwater drilling in the Gulf of Mexico would have been enough to gut 10 anti-pollution bills back in the ’70s,” said Nick Tennelly, a 28-year-old government relations associate at ExxonMobil. “And I think he exaggerates a lot. He once stopped me in the hallway to tell me about this time when, for just a few million dollars, they got the vice president of the United States to convene a secret task force to block green energy initiatives. C’mon. I know things were cheaper in the past, but I have a tough time believing they were that cheap.”

“To be honest, I don’t even see what the big deal is,” Tennelly added. “Even if the industry’s now spending a couple hundred million dollars on lobbying every year, it’s still a drop in the bucket compared to our annual tax breaks.”

Canned oxygen for sissies

Hi readers.

I finally just said, “To hell with it.”  Ordered something called Oxygen Boost in a can.  60 deep breaths per can.  Even though it doesn’t make a lot of sense, the oxygen-concentrating machine I used when I stayed at Eddie Brewer’s place last year seemed to help a lot.  Several times when I was in the midst of seemingly major events it brought them to an immediate halt.

The past few days around here, maybe because of the Orange Ozone Alert, have me thinking it’s time to give O2 another try, despite the fact the various sawbones haven’t seen fit to prescribe it.  I haven’t been able to exercise for several days, which they did prescribe.

Anyway, if these 60 breath cans of 02 get the job done I’ll be back banging on the door of the VA over in KC Missouri threatening to scream and hold my breath if they can’t bring themselves to prescribe something to fill in during those moments when Mother Earth just isn’t enough.

After all, is it not written, “You veterans are responsible for keeping us free!  You brave guys deserve the absolute best for killing all those brown people who wanted to take away our freedoms!  And while a lot of people can breathe easier because of all the freedoms you protected, if you breathe hard we can afford a bit of oxygen to help you along?”  Ahem.   You believe the bullshit comes out of the mouths of patriots?

Well, I’m truly moved, though I din’t kill any brown people who were trying to take away our freedom.  Got into a few fights with some in bars but nobody got hurt  too badly.  Bastards trying to steal our freedoms.

And I’d breathe more easily if someone over at the VA fixed me up with the freedom to breath when the going gets tough.

Is it not written, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going?”

I ain’t going anywhere without being able to, including all the usual mobility abilities.

Meanwhile there’s canned air at a price that’s probably a bargain considering I don’t drink bottled water.

Besides, the something for nothing  I’m going after is AIR!  What the hell can air cost when you buy it in volume?    Economy of scale.  That sort of thing.

Old Jules

 

Did Obama kill John Kennedy?

A growing body of evidence uncovered by diligent citizens reveals shocking truths.  It’s a question that’s troubled me for some while.

Did Obama Kill JFK?

But there’s also this:

My Time Travel Adventures With Barack Obama

And this:

Time Travel, Time Machines & Alien Contact – A Rare Interview From 1964

Whistleblowers on US Govt Time Travel & Teleportation | Extraordinary Year July 11, 2012

How to make a simple Time Machine

If the Prez killed JFK as an adult traveling in time it’s a far more serious matter than if he did it as an infant, presumably having been through firearms training in Arizona.

Old Jules

 

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