Tag Archives: Zionists

Old Sol: “Just mood swings. It happens. These gender changes don’t help.”

Hi readers. Thanks for coming by for a read.

I’ve got a lot of questions for Old Sol, but I have to take them slowly, easily.

Me: So, what’s the deal on all this Middle East extremism? That seems to be escalating.

Old Sol: Some celestial object deities have a delicate touch, some don’t. I’m more into playing Chopsticks than a piano sonata. I get up on the wrong side of the bed and things happen. French Revolution. Russian Revolution. No harm intended. It just happens.

Me: So all these Muslims and Zionist extremists are fired up because you let one of your moods get away from you?

Old Sol: Partly. Of course, I didn’t tie up some loose ends a while back. I had it on my list to do something decisive so those people weren’t running around thinking they’re Chosen People. But other things came up and it slipped my mind.

Me: But what about those Muslims? That whole thing seems to be on the upswing?

Old Sol: You’ve got to understand. Back then things were chaotic. No sooner got the Roman Gods put to sleep and the Jews scattering than Christians and Muslims popped up and started fighting one another. It isn’t as though putting out fires is all I have to do. I’ve got these other planets, moons, comets, asteroids to keep doing their jobs. And that damned Jupiter.

Me: Jupiter?

Old Sol: I swear, between Jupiter and Saturn it’s a wonder I find time to do anything else. All those moons and rings, posturing and strutting, throwing out magnetic fields from hell to breakfast.

Me: So what are you going to do with the Zionists and Muslims?

Old Sol: They’re just going to have to take care of one another for a while. I’ve got this hormone thing. You people in the US are the new Chosen People, but I think you’d be better off staying out of it. You’re the best I’ve got, and I’d like to see some land left down there people can live on once all the ice melts. Not much chance of that in the Middle East or downwind from the north Pacific.

Me: Thanks for the wakeup call.

Old Jules

Terrorists are simple, God-fearing folk

Doesn’t seem to matter whether they’re Shiite or Sunni Muslims, or Israeli Zionists, Northern Ireland Catholics, or US troops and mercenaries.

Some big name somebody-or-other observed, “There are no atheists in the foxholes.”

My guess is that the reason there are no atheists in the foxholes is that the atheists are the ones actually giving the orders to blow things all to hell somewhere. Or at least atheists giving lip service to one religion or another.

And they need simple, God-fearing folk to get the job done.

Just a guess, though.

Old Jules