Daily Archives: October 2, 2013

US government shutdown of military operations crisis – Chinese quick-fix for US patriots: GI Joe dolls

Hi readers.  Thanks for coming by for a read.


GI Joe doll s

We’ve all been concerned, world wide, about the tensions the shutdown of military operations as a result of the budget thing would cause US patriots.  Thankfully, the Chinese have rushed to provide a solution.  Factories in China will begin working three shifts immediately in hopes of preventing catastrophic nervious conditions among US patriots by prioritizing shipping container shiploads of GI Joe Dolls as soon as possible.

GI Joe doll 2

In addition to these, a new line of target action figures wearing robes, turbans and burnooses, with butcherknives clinched in their teeth will be available.  Village life scene settings will be offered as well, both pre-drone attack, and afterward.

Chinese psychologists believe that, properly used at home by US patriots, these action figures and settings can reduce road rage and shopping mall shootings likely to occur as a result of frustration tensions when military operations overseas aren’t happening.

Old Jules

Israeli standup comedian in the United Nations

Hi readers.  I had to throw this in because it’s so outer space.

Hotshot Israeli talking to the United Nations had them all gasping with laughter yesterday when he, with a perfectly straight face, told them all they couldn’t trust Iran.

How the hell do they come up with this stuff?

Old Jules

Gorilla war in Columbia – perfect timing, cheaper and more dope than Afghanistan

That gorilla's loaded to the gills with nose candy.  It's no mystery why that war's lasted 50 years.

That gorilla’s loaded to the gills with nose candy. It’s no mystery why that war’s lasted 50 years.

Hi readers.  Thanks for coming by for a read this morning.

I saw on Yahoo news yesterday there’s a gorilla war going on in Columbia.  The what?  President?  Prime Minister?  Dicktater? anyway the sadly weakened strong-man in Columbia was saying they needed help from Cuba or Venzu-whatchallit-wala to put an end to it.

Help from  Cuba?  Hell man, we can send General Arnold Swartzkopff some trucks and move Fort Hood Texas straight through Mexico be down to help them in a New York minute.  While the government’s shut down.

Corner the market on addictive drugs worldwide quicker than you can tell about it.  Have the rest of the world vomiting and trembling and begging us for something to snort or shoot that’s more satisfying than shooting Muslims.

Sure, there’s the shale oil probably in Mexico we’ll pick off on the way down there, but oil is so damned 20th Century.  Cocaine’s where the future is.

Strike while the iron’s hot and Congress can claim they didn’t know because they were fretting about the budget.

Old Jules